As good as it gets

M  E  S  S  Y.  C  H  A  O  T  I  C.  S  T  R  E  S  S  F  U  L.

Three words that best describe the past three weeks of my life..

A  P  P  R  E  C  I  A  T  I  O  N

Is the one word that makes it all go away..

Today I broke down on my Father’s feet. Because I’m tired. I’m not strong enough and I want to give up. But I’m not a quitter. It was a battle of figuring out what to do and how to move forward from where I am standing.

He made me realize that in order for me to let go of the ill and negative feelings that I have.. I have to learn to appreciate the good in everyone.

I need to appreciate that even if my dad says the nastiest things about me or about how i work, his intention was for my best. I need to learn to laugh with my mother through her tough times. I need to love the food that my brother cooks because he tried his best given his condition. I need to trust that my sister knows where she’s going. I need to smile at my nephew because he’s the sweetest kid ever and I raised him like that.

I need to make my colleague see that she need not feel indifferent about things but just do her job well. I need to accept that I have flaws and that I can be the dumbest thing ever because that makes me human. I need to learn everyday because life is learning.

I need to know that there is more to life than just trying to be bad all the time. I need to know that each of us have our own crosses to bear and that we deal with it differently. I need to respect that.

Life is gonna be good as it gets.. That’s how things are going to be.. No more no less..

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~ by 3lm0l0v3r on January 22, 2011.

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